“I Guess… I’m Afraid” — What Arthur Morgan Taught Me About Redemption

Red Dead Redemption 2 spoilers ahead.

Video games have always been my favorite hobby and at some point in the last 20 years or so they became my favorite medium of storytelling, and Red Dead Redemption 2 is my personal favorite story of all time. You play as Arthur Morgan an outlaw who spent his life doing outlaw type of activities but something has changed, Arthur Morgan is dying.

Towards the end of the game he’s at Emerald Station, seeing off an acquaintance, when he runs into an old friend—Sister Calderón. She’s full of joy, preparing to leave on a mission to Mexico. But she can tell something’s wrong. Arthur’s face is gaunt, his spirit worn down. She asks what’s troubling him… and what follows is too honest, too beautiful to cut short—so here it is in full:

Arthur:
“I’m, uh... I’m dyin’, Sister. Yeah, I got TB. I got it... beatin’ a man, to death... for a few bucks. I’ve lived a bad life, Sister.”

Sister Calderón:
“We’ve all lived bad lives, Mr. Morgan. We all sin... but I know you.”

Arthur:
“You don’t know me.”

Sister Calderón:
“Forgive me... but that’s the problem. You don’t know you.”

Arthur:
“What do you mean?”

Sister Calderón:
“I don’t know... whenever we happen to meet, you’re always helping people and smiling.”

Arthur:
“I had a son... he passed away. I had a girl who loved me... I threw that away. My momma died when I was a kid, and my daddy... well, I watched him die. And it weren’t soon enough.”

Sister Calderón:
“My husband died a long time ago. Life is full of pain. But there is also love, and beauty.”

Arthur:
“What am I gonna do now?”

Sister Calderón:
“Be grateful that for the first time, you see your life clearly. Perhaps you could help somebody? Helping makes you really happy.”

Arthur:
“But... I still don’t believe in nothin’.”

Sister Calderón:
“Often, neither do I. But then, I meet someone like you... and everything makes sense.”

Arthur:
“Heh... You’re too smart for me, Sister. I guess I... I’m afraid.”

Sister Calderón:
“There is nothing to be afraid of. Take a gamble that love exists, and do a loving act.”

That moment hits me hard.

It’s quiet. It’s human. It’s not a redemption arc wrapped in a neat little bow. It’s just a man worn thin by pain and fear, finally honest with himself. And it’s a woman reminding him—gently, without preaching—that love is still an option. That helping others can still matter. That it’s not too late to change direction, even if the road ahead is short. Now I know that I have not lived a life akin to Arthur, I’ve never beat a man to death, I’ve never been in a gang, but I still know what its like to have regrets and to be in search of redemption.

That’s why photography means so much to me.

It’s how I slow down. How I pay attention. It’s how I try to give something back, to notice the beauty and truth that still exist in this world. Every image I create is a small, loving act. Something real. Something I hope might matter to someone else.

If you haven’t played Red Dead Redemption 2, I can’t recommend it enough. Few stories in any medium carry the kind of emotional weight and quiet, human truth that this one does.

Like Arthur, I’m still afraid. But I’m taking the gamble. Choosing to create, to give—even when I don’t know what comes next. That being said if you want to make the future a little less scary for me, go a head and check out my pictures I have for sale here.